My crown has been bought and paid for

Jeremiah 17:7 ‘But blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord, whose confidence is in him.

Oh dear, major wobble this morning, not even sure why but found Church incredibly hard, why?  Lack of self-worth, not feeling like I belonged, but it’s so irrational cos I do know I belong and I do know there are lots of people who love and care for me there so was really tough, perhaps I just try too hard sometimes, I don’t know but I do know the answer lies in God, I do trust him and am confident in him and I am going to keep talking to him and praying for more self-confidence and self-worth in every situation.

FITTING IN

Why do I try so hard to fit in when maybe I was born to stand out, maybe this is what it’s all about, a desire to fit in, to prove my worth to others when really why should I be bothered about the opinions of others I should simply be obedient to God, and it is hard but I need to learn to see myself as God sees me, to remember that my past is just a story and once I realise that, once I really believe that my past is gone or maybe just that my past is of no consequence, it has no power over me and I should never give in to discouragement, never bother about where I fit in, my crown has been bought and paid for, so I should put it on my head and wear it, I am good enough, I am worthy, I am capable and the truth is inescapable,  I am important, loved and never alone, so when I feel like the world is swallowing me up, when I feel the world shouting you’ll never measure up, I must listen to the whisper from God “you are my child, you are always enough, remember who you belong to”, the real me does not need to prove my worth to others, God doesn’t treat me as ordinary, God knows my story, sees that I have been criticising myself for years and again he whispers, “it hasn’t worked, try approving of yourself and see what happens”, praise be to God our Saviour who bears my burdens that when I stop looking for the worst, the storm passes, the rainbow emerges and I receive God’s promises, his blessings, his love, for when I trust him, totally trust the Lord, have confidence in his word, confidence that I have heard him and he has filled me with his Spirit, I am assured that he is with me and why do I need to fit in, even Jesus himself was an outsider, so he gets me, he loves me, I am his handiwork, created in Jesus to do his will, his beauty lies in me, Jesus shines through me, I am unique and I don’t need to be anyone else but me, daughter of God, I am loved, cherished and free.

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